Dear Breast Pump,
This day has finally come. Our last pump session. I’ve waited for this day for over a year, but yet, I’m somehow bittersweet that our time together has come to an end. You’ve been such a huge part of my new mommy life that it just seems wrong that after today, I’ll just pack you up to put into storage in some dark closet, where you’ll wait patiently for the day you become useful again. You deserve much better. You need to know how much you mean to me.
I must admit, I do feel silly writing this letter. I mean, how did I become so emotionally attached to a pump designed to extract breastmilk?? But with the end of this journey drawing near, I have come to realize you were more than that.
You were my partner in so many things. You were with me in the early days, when I would wake up at 4 am to pump so I could provide enough for our baby, your constant lullaby lulling me back to sleep. Over the past year, we have binge-watched so many Netflix shows together, sitting on our designated spots on the couch. We were attached at the hip, except in a more intimate place ????. I couldn’t go anywhere without you. When we made plans to run errands or go out, you were my first thought. How would I pack you? Where would we pump? Most of the time, though, my schedule actually revolved around our time together. You were literally an extension of me and it’s bittersweet that you will no longer be by my side.
You witnessed my triumphs and my failures. You’ve seen my tears and my cheers. When I was struggling to pump “just enough”, you were there as I chugged gallons of water, tried different supplements, and power pumped. At those times, I hated you. It was easy to blame you for why my pump bottles were not filling up with liquid gold and why my already small freezer stash was depleting. But then, we got into our rhythm! We figured out how to maximize our pump sessions. Suddenly, we were making enough for our baby and then some! Then, ironically, we experienced the pain of engorgement and many clogged ducts together. You helped me then too. You have been my savior.
You allowed me to be a working mother. Going back to work after maternity leave was one of the hardest things I’ve had to endure this past year. Knowing that at least our baby was getting the best nutrition possible helped put my mind at ease. Even more so, pumping allowed others to bond with baby, including daddy and grandparents. Those precious moments mean so much to our family and we have you to thank for that.
And finally, you did your job. You provided nutrition. Together, we grew a happy and healthy one-year-old! However, in addition to our baby, you also provided nutrition to others. We became so effective at pumping that we were able to donate milk to those babies in need. What a powerful and emotional feeling to be able to do that. And how amazing is it that technology gave us this opportunity!
So here’s to our last pump session (for a while, anyways). Let’s sit back, watch Netflix, and enjoy our last moments together. Thank you for all that you have done.
A Pumping Mama